Cooking jokes

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Chukcha bought a refrigerator

Chukcha bought a refrigerator.
— What do you need this fridge for? You live in Siberia.
— To warm up during winter. Imagine the joy - it`s -40 outside and +4 in the refrigerator.
Humor

A teaspoon of sugar

- What caused your breakup?
- Lying.
- What exactly?
“I asked if I could put sugar in his coffee.” And he said:
- Lie in!
Humor

The difference between a man and a woman

What is the difference between a drunk man and a woman:
When a man drinks, he forgets everything.
When a woman drinks, she remembers everything!
Humor

Bad food

Restaurant visitor to the waiter, dissatisfied with food:
- You don’t even have to eat this... This is already shit!
Humor

Not afraid of wife

- Fedya! You know, when I drink, I’m not afraid of anyone!
- And are you not afraid of your wife?
- Well ... I can’t drink that much!
Humor

Man and woman

A man without a woman is like a dog without fleas ... You can live, but boring!
A woman without a man is like a flea without a dog ... You can live, but there is no one to bite!
Humor

Culinary surprise for a husband

A tired husband returns home from work late in the evening.
“What have you prepared for me today?” he asked his wife.
Standing on a chair, the wife straightened up her bathrobe and said:
- A song!
Humor

Better eat out

Two friends are talking.
- Recently, my husband admitted that the reason for his marriage to me was the fact that he did not like to eat out.
“So now he is constantly having lunch at home?” - the friend asks.
“Quite the opposite!” Now he already likes to eat out.
Humor

Hungry husband

The husband addresses his wife:
- Darling, I want to eat!
The wife who was sitting in front of the TV answers:
“Well, then break your eggs.”
The husband is surprised:
- Well, I got your terms! So, maybe I should break my hand as well, so that you cook faster?
Humor

Couple in a restaurant

At the restaurant, the husband awkwardly chopped meat, as a result of which spray of sauce left spots on his wife's blouse.
The wife could not resist, and strictly turned to her husband:
- Misha, do you like it now?! I look like a pig!
The husband calmly replied:
“I didn’t mean to say, but your blouse is dirty too.”
Humor

Lunch with music

Restaurant: Visitors have lunch, and the orchestra plays one music after another without interruption.
One of the dining clients calls the waiter and asks:
- Tell me please! Is the orchestra commissioned by visitors?
“Yes, of course,” the waiter answers. And what do you want them to play?
“Let them play poker for 15 minutes until I finish lunch.”
Humor

About section "Cooking jokes"

Mushroom sauce
22-12-2019, 16:04

Buckwheat with beef
21-12-2019, 22:18

Rice-free chicken meatballs
21-12-2019, 21:50

Chicken liver pate
21-12-2019, 12:58

Vegetable ratatouille
20-12-2019, 22:24

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